Post Baby Belly...When Will it Go Away?!?

After talking with a girlfriend who recently had a baby and watching Kendra on E!, I am reminded of that blessed time right after you have had your baby. Not only do you have your most precious baby, but you still have a baby bump as well (and it's usually a lot mushier than it was when you were pregnant. Ugh!).

I suppose it makes sense, since most of the women I know gained 30-40 pounds during pregnancy and then had a 6-8 pound baby. But mentally, as a new mom, you still aren't prepared for it. I know I wasn't. I expected/hoped the baby would come out and all the weight would fall out right along with it. But as many of the moms that came before reminded me, "It took 9 months for you to gain the weight, it is going to take a while for the weight to come off."

Blah, blah, blah...but it's true. And now I pass the same advice on to those moms who come after me.

The key thing to remember is to take care of yourself and your baby. I will admit that nursing really helped me get rid of the baby belly. Nursing helps contract your uterus, which is why you can get those lovely cramps while you are nursing! But contracting can be good because it is also helping the uterus shrink back down to a normal size...or as normal as it is going to get. While you are in the hospital and in the 2-3 weeks after having the baby, massaging your belly/uterus can help with the cramps and also help it shrink down to its new size - or so I was told by the nurses when I was in the hospital with #2.

And I hate to scare anyone that is pregnant, but I must warn you that your post baby body will be different from your pre-baby body. This doesn't mean that your body gets better or worse - just different!

When it comes to exercising after having your baby, be sure to consult with your doctor before doing anything. What you are able to do after having a baby is highly dependent on what you were able to do before and during your pregnancy. I think the key thing to remember is moderation and starting off slow. Your body will be exhausted from working so hard as a new mommy that you need to focus on getting rest. But taking the baby for a walk in the stroller is a great way to get some fresh air, a change in scenery, and your blood flowing a bit.

I am happy to report that after having my second child, my body seemed to bounce back faster than after I had my first. (Perhaps chasing my first child around helped shed the weight faster!)

But every woman is different and every body is different. After having a baby, it is best to just take care of yourself and your beautiful little bundle of joy!

P.S. I threw in the picture above to show that it is okay to look exhausted, in pajamas/sweats and without make-up after you have had a baby. It's life as a new mommy...get used to it!

Advice #11 for Expecting Moms

Don't let the cute smile fool you. My 2-year daughter has really plunged into the terrible 2's.

I find that I have been reminding myself of today's advice a lot in the past week or so. So thank you, Abby, for helping to put things in perspective with your advice:

"Try not to take it personally when they disobey when they get a little older. Kids can be stinkers!"

Oh yes, they certainly can be stinkers!

Advice #10 for Expecting Moms

This week's advice for expecting moms comes from Rachel in Maryland. I really couldn't have said it much better than this, so I will leave it to her words:

"The best advice I could give is to not have many expectations. Before my first son was born I was a perfectionist who worried over everything. Before he was born I had planned out how everything would be! Life with children is anything, but predictable. Just enjoy the time you have with them, be very flexible and expect the unexpected (in a good way)."

Thanks, Rachel! And if you missed any of the past advice, be sure to check out all of your Advice for Expecting Mommies.

P.S. Above is the trailer for the movie, Parenthood, for your amusement. It makes a lot more sense now that it did 20 years ago!

Advice #9 for Expecting Moms

When your baby enters the world, everything gets turned upside down. Something that you want to make sure DOESN'T get turned upside down is your relationship with your spouse.

Here's some advice from Deci Worland that every new mom can use:

"My best advice is to allow for couple time, do not neglect your husband."

This may be difficult in the first few weeks but always make time for your partner. A wise person once told me the best gift you can give your child is a happy home. And a happy home begins with a loving relationship.

Image courtesy of Baxterboo.com

Advice #8 for Expecting Moms

This week's advice is all about you as Mommy. Yes, it is okay to think about you, too.

"The best advice I can offer, since I just had my second is let people help you. Take their offer, you don't have to be a "hero" and its ok to want to accept help. You are still a mom and need time for yourself. I was always afraid to leave him and take an afternoon for myself. It is important to take care of yourself because you are the one taking care of baby."

Thank you, Preppy Mama, for these wise words! And if you are having a tough time leaving your baby for even the shortest bit of time, take baby steps. Get out of the house by yourself for a short activity like a pedicure. Not only will your mind appreciate the break, your feet and back will enjoy the rest as well.

Image courtesy of MarieClaire.com

Advice #7 for Expecting Moms

This week's advice is all about keeping up with the Jones'...that is, trying to avoid that pitfall.

Peg42 wrote, "Don't compare (your) baby to friends' babies. Every child reach milestones at their own pace."

This advice is so true, but I also know that it is so hard not to compare. As a person who has taken a million behavior and personality tests showing that my strongest behavioral trait is to compare/compete, it takes some real effort to stay focused on my children's development and not how they compare to others.

Don't get me wrong, as a parent you do want to make sure your child hits certain developmental milestones, but for their own sake, not for your own.

It's easier said than done, especially when your child seems to be on the slower side of the curve. But keep in mind, a baby that takes a little longer to crawl gives you a little more time to leave him/her hanging out on the floor without the worry of them darting off into another room. While it is exciting that s/he has reached that milestone, you will at times wish s/he still was just hanging out in the almost crawling (on all fours rocking motion) position.

Parenting is challenging enough without throwing in the comparison game...so just don't do it!

Advice #6 For Expecting Moms

This week's advice came through loud and clear in many of your comments. I think Kerrie in Bothell, Wash. sums it up pretty well:

"My advice is to cherish every minute. When my daughter was an infant, it seemed like every day lasted forever but looking back the years went by so fast. So just remember as your baby hits each new phase, it will not last very long and you will be onto the next before you know it."

And as I learned quickly from my first child, and then of course, the second baby, the new phase isn't always a better or easier phase. It's just something new you need to learn about. Just remind yourself it is all part of the joy of parenthood. As Kerrie mentioned, it may not feel like joy at the time, but that's exactly what it is!

Thanks to Kerrie and the many others who offered this wonderful advice!

Advice #5 for Expecting Moms

This week's advice is all about schedule. Thanks Sunnydaze99 for this advice:

"My best advice to a new mom is to get yourself and your child on a routine as soon as possible. Children thrive on routine."

I totally agree. Kids/babies can't tell time, but they can adjust and understand a routine. Routine makes nap time and bedtime much easier at my house...and that is enough proof for me!

Advice #4 for Expecting Moms

A month or so ago I asked for your advice for expecting moms. Wow! You all had such great advice. And since I know many of you many have given your advice, but didn't check out the advice others gave, I am going to share this advice on a weekly basis. I will share the advice just as it was shared to me and add my commentary when I find it appropriate.

So here goes...

"My biggest piece of advice is rest when the baby rests- who cares if dinner needs to made-take a nap when baby does. Also learn to shut off and ignore the phone, the texts and emails. Learn to not answer the door and put up a note that says please do not ring bell- baby sleeping- or my husband got a doorbell that plugs in so only the front of the house hears it and does not bother the rest and you can unplug it for complete quiet. Learn to give yourself rest and close your eyes and ignore the world except your family in the home. Everyone wants to see new baby, but they need to understand you need to rest too. "

I agree 100%. There were times, especially in the first few weeks of my kids' lives, that I found myself crying uncontrollably because I couldn't do all the things that I wanted to do. And oddly enough, a nap actually made me feel better.

Thanks for the advice, MOMFOREVERANDEVER. Stay tuned for more helpful tips!

Image courtesy of Treehugger.com

Advice #3 for Expecting Moms

So, I mentioned bringing a nursing pillow to the hospital when you go into labor. Now that you have the gear, here is a quick piece of advice that seems like a no brainer, but as an exhausted first time mom, you will be surprised what you forget.

When nursing your child in the hospital make sure to sit up. Again, I know this sounds like a no brainer, but I thought I was sitting up in my hospital bed trying to nurse and still had such a tough time. But it wasn't until I actually sat in a chair that I realized how reclined I was in the hospital bed. And trust me, sitting up, and even a little forward, makes a huge difference when you are nursing. Gravity really does work!

If you attended any sort of prenatal classes, you probably saw a birthing video where it showed a newborn find his/her mother's breast and immediately start nursing. With my first child, I waited for an hour for him to find it...he never did. Naturally, I was confused because the video said this would happen. But I quickly learned I had to take a much more active role.

If you choose to nurse in your hospital bed (as most new mommies do because someone else is usually sitting in the chair in your room!), I highly recommend sitting up in bed with your legs crossed in front of you with your nursing pillow on your lap.

Another little hint: after even just a few days of nursing, you may notice your shoulders shrugging forward, your back hurting, and possibly even some tension headaches. Make an effort to pull your shoulders back and stand (or sit) with the best posture possible. Your back will thank you for it later!

Advice #2 for Expecting Moms

At the end of your third trimester, naturally you think about your trip to the hospital and what you need to pack. While most lists from your doctor and/or hospital will tell you everything you need to bring, there is one key item they leave off...the nursing pillow. Sure, the list might mention a pillow, and every TV show you'll see will show a pregnant woman being wheeled in with her favorite bed pillow. But the hospital has plenty of pillows. The pillow you need is the nursing pillow.

The Boppy is by far the most popular nursing pillow, but I will shout until I am blue in the face that the Brest Friend nursing pillow is THE best nursing pillow. Click here to check out my dissertation on why you should use the Brest Friend.

Advice for Expecting Moms

In honor of a few friends who are ready to pop, and due any day now, I wanted to pass on some advice that I would have loved to know right before taking that trip to the hospital. I will pass on this advice over the next few days, so as to not overwhelm you!

Having said that, my first piece of advice is for the delivery room. If you are having a c-section, this advice doesn't apply to you. However, if you are pushing your little peanut out, then here are a couple of things you might like to know.

When I was pushing my first child out, a nurse in the delivery room told me to push like I was doing a sit-up.

It was amazing the difference that advice made. For starters, with my first sit-up push, I actually saw the lump of my son's body move downward. Secondly, many women are afraid of having a bowel movement while in the delivery room. And some women think that you are supposed to push like you are trying to have a bowel movement. Hmm, if you push like you are having a bowel movement, then you might just have a bowel movement.

Trust me, doing a sit-up is the way to avoid these worries. And I don't mean to brag, but with my son I pushed for about 20 minutes and about 15 minutes with my daughter. Doing the sit-up is worth the try, isn't it?

(P.S. I know the image above is not of a pregnant women doing a sit-up, but hey, do you know many pregnant women who would let someone take a photo of them doing a sit-up??? Didn't think so!)

Image courtesy of FitFAQs.co.uk