Monday, June 16, 2008

Don't Let Bad Habits Ruin your Marriage

Let me start off by saying that I am not a relationship expert. However, I came across an article that talked about bad habits that can ruin your marriage that made me think. Here are the top 10 ideas that can destroy a marriage:

  1. Not having sex
  2. Letting yourself go
  3. Spending too much time with the in-laws (which includes telling them private information)
  4. Spending too much time with work, friends, hobbies
  5. Not consulting your partner about purchases
  6. Forgetting the smaller gestures
  7. Criticizing and nagging endlessly
  8. Always playing the victim
  9. Sweating the small stuff
  10. Not fighting fair

Having said all these, let's turn them into positive ideas on how to keep a marriage healthy and happy. (You know, how you felt on your wedding day!)

  1. Have Sex!
  2. Don't let yourself go...put a little extra effort to look attractive for your spouse (he or she will most likely do the same in return!)
  3. Don't spend too much time with the in-laws...you have your own family now!
  4. Don't spend too much time with work, friends, and hobbies because your spouse is bound to feel unimportant in your life. This means get your priorities straight...your spouse comes first!
  5. Talk to your spouse about money. Come to some sort of agreement on what purchases your need to consult with each other on and those you can make on your own. And while you are at it, talk about how money will be handled and who will be paying the bills - well, at least the activity of making the payment!
  6. Make small gestures like a hug and kiss when you walk in the door, holding his/her hand when sitting next to each other, or saying thank you when your spouse does something for you.
  7. Don't criticize or nag your spouse - remember, you chose your spouse for better or worse and should have known this about him/her when you tied the knot. And remember, nagging often leads to tuning out anyway.
  8. Don't always play the victim. Take responsibility for a bad behavior. The sooner take responsibility, the sooner you can move on and be happy with one another.
  9. Don't sweat the small stuff. I know, easier said than done, but him leaving the toilet seat up every now and again isn't going to kill you. Just remember, you have annoying habits and forget to do things every now and again, too! Lots of things are going to go wrong in a marriage, so you really have to figure out what is worth getting upset over.
  10. Fight fair. Arguing in a marriage is inevitable, but just make sure you have good intentions when you are arguing with your spouse.
Did I miss anything? What do you think it takes to keep a marriage happy and healthy?

Click here to see the entire article.

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